Archive for June, 2013

Five Mad (Men) Predictions

Posted: June 25, 2013 in T.V.

Don DraperNext year will be the final season of Mad Men, and it will be bittersweet. The show has cranked out season after season of the best written television in a long time, the cast has grown into household names (and none bigger than Jon Hamm), all while trying to develop around major social events in (mostly) American history. This past season focused on 1968, and if it keeps pace with how it has been jumping thus far, it would be fair to see the show end in 1970. So, with the timeframe in mind and seeing how the company (SPOILER ALERT!!) told Don to go on sabbatical, allow me to take a look ahead to the 70’s and see how some plot points will play out (of course, according to me and I can assure you that I have ZERO connection with Matthew Weiner).

5 – The Company Splits

During the finale, Don hinted at the fact that there should be S-C-L-M-N-O-P-N-Y and S-C-Q-R-S-T-U -L-A (or whatever their initials are; it’s harder to keep track of than the Game of Thrones cast). In short, the company needs a New York and an L.A. office. With the fact that the old seem to be getting older and more out of touch with the social revolution (keep in mind, in 1970 this, this and THIS all happen making for some crazy water cooler talk), it can be easy to see a divide and people just not wanting to work for one boss over another. The New York office takes all the conservative people while the L.A. office recruits Harry, Stan, and anyone who wants to make an “Animal House Agency”.

4 – Bob Benson is a Con Artist

A lot of people in the internet have him pegged as a spy. While it would be amazing to think that (especially since he was speaking, what appeared to be, fluent Spanish to a man who wore his mustache like a certain cartoon criminal!), I would have to believe that Bob is nothing more than a crook. Think about it (SPOILERS!!!): Pete’s mom is super rich, Manolo “isn’t interested”, but if they wed, sign some paperwork, she dies, Bob’s fingerprints are all over this, and they both get busted. The big question will be seeing if Pete and his brother get to keep any money their rich mother left them. Hmm.

3 – Death of Bert Cooper

Don’t kid yourself, this could secretly be far more destructive to the office than anyone could imagine. Bert Cooper has always come across as the Phil Jackson of the office; “The Zen Master.” (and they even have similar creepy facial hair! Check it out here and here.)  Bert always preached patience and level-headedness, and once that’s gone this entire office could collapse on itself. Not to mention, when was the last time the show had a significant death? This past season, Roger Sterling lost his mother and it showed us all how weak he can be. Imagine losing a business partner you’ve had for years! This could actually be early on in the season and then we can watch the office unravel.

2 – Megan Draper goes back to Montreal; leaves Don

For the record: I’ve been calling this shot since late-season five. It’s one of the reasons why I’m not allowed to watch Mad Men at my friend’s place (well, that and they cancelled their cable). At the beginning of this season, we were talking and I felt (and still do) that Megan has to go home because her father is in trouble. Many Americans (and, arguably, Canadians…or Canadiens…or Canadiennes if there’s a group of only females present reading this) don’t realize that in 1970, Canada was having its own internal conflict: The October Crisis. Basically, extremists who wanted nothing more than a French country set off bombs, sent Quebec into lockdown, people were kidnapped, the Minister of Labour in Quebec was killed, and it was resolved by allowing the kidnappers have a lifelong stay in Cuba (because we all know that Cuba is known as “Petit Paris” to outsiders due to the vast Francophone population). Megan felt such guilt during the Chicago riots, how could she NOT go home during this time? It might actually break Don. (NOTE: For any Americans reading this, you’ll be happy to know that the Province of Quebec has come a LONG way since this time where they wanted a French-Socialist state. Read this if you don’t believe me.)

1 – Don Draper Dies

Hold on! Just hold on and let me explain! Let’s go through this: Don’s been “asked to leave” for an extended period of time from work (possibly the only thing that keeps him going on a daily basis), he wants nothing more than to keep getting away from what he is even though he’s slowly bringing people into his own world (the final scene with his kids), and if Megan leaves him for her family (and she was ready to split after the L.A. deal fell through because they have nothing), than what else does he have? The kids would be in New York getting raised by Betty and Harry (the “perfect” family), no wife, and no ties to work. You could very easily see the show ending with Don, wearing his dress shirt and pants, walking into the Pacific Ocean when the sun sets. The camera zooms out and pans down where you see a blazer, two shoes, a neck tie, the phrase “The Jumping Off Point” written in the sand, and then this song plays.

Thanks for reading and don’t forget to follow me on Twitter: @ChrisFudali

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The Best Upfront

Posted: June 15, 2013 in T.V.

Networks Logos

Over the last couple of weeks, television networks in the States have been promoting their fall lineup with their “Up Fronts”. In short, an “Up Front” is like a gathering where celebrities attend to help promote the shows they’re on and you also get to see trailers for said shows. (By “gathering”, I mean it’s like sitting through a two-plus hour timeshare promotional meeting with the promise of free food and booze afterwards…which makes me ask: Where’s my invite? Email me for next year. Seriously.) Below are five shows that have been picked up and will be available on various networks for the fall.

Brooklyn Nine-Nine – Fox

 Here’s what we can assume: Andy Samberg was available. This show was available. Andy Samberg joined this show and it’s going to be on Fox. Holy Crap! Andy Samberg has a new show and it’s NOT on NBC! How did they whiff on this one? AND Fox was able to recruit Terry Crews and Andre Braugher, make it look great, and Lorne Michaels DIDN’T have enough pull to get this on NBC?! Aside from Hannibal (which I think has been nothing short of amazing), this move basically shows why NBC is where NBC is in the “Big Four”. Pour one out in memory for what NBC used to have for comedy.

 Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. – ABC

 Yes, I joked around when I saw the trailer the first time and wrote this, but it will be a show to watch if for no other reason than the hopes that this article may come true. The more I watch the trailer, the more it grows on me (even if I think the CGI looks a little weak for TV and question how the story line will develop week after week).

 The Goldbergs – ABC

 This almost reminds me of Titus and how great that show was. Surly father? Yes. Crazy mother? Yes. Space cadet brother? Yes. Switch out a questionable best friend for an annoying sister and a pimped out grandpa and you could very well have a hit. I won’t play spoiler but the creepiest part to all of this will come at the end with the video tapes. (Oh, and having Patton Oswalt narrating it never hurts.)

 Hostages – CBS

Creator 1 – “Hey guys, let’s take all the cool plot 80’s action plot points where an agent goes rouge and wants the president dead but takes hostage of a doctor and her family to make sure she does the deed.”
Creator 2 – “Who can we get that’ll play the rouge agent?”
Creator 1 – “I was thinking Dylan McDermott.”
Creator 3 – “Wasn’t he just in “Olympus Has Fallen“? Kinda playing a very similar character?”
Creator 1 – “Uh, Yeah! It’s called ‘striking when the iron’s hot’!”
Creator 2 – “Done!”

Hostages! Airs this fall!

The Michael J Fox Show – NBC

Okay, this is the sucker card. I loved Family Ties (even if my memory of it was a little foggy…but could never forget this), thought he was great in Spin City, (haven’t even TOUCHED Back to the Future or Teen Wolf) and the fact that he’s back is nothing short of amazing. Watch at least the first 5 episodes to make him feel good. You know you want to.

 Thanks for reading and don’t forget to follow me on Twitter: @ChrisFudali

sam jackson

This past week, Samuel L. Jackson took to Reddit to try and raise money for the Alzheimer’s Association (which you can read bout here).  He basically set benchmarks so if certain amounts were raised, he would record something for fans. One of those things recorded was the “I’m the one who knocks” monologue from Breaking Bad. Check it out here:

 Now, I love Samuel L. Jackson. I think he would be the greatest hockey coach of all time (apologies to Scotty Bowman) and is phenomenal on Twitter. Read this:

 (Seriously. I would pay for HBO so I can hear “Uncensored Samuel L Jackson Olympic Coverage.” Take THAT, NBC!)

But there’s something about this particular monologue that shouldn’t be messed with.  If you don’t think so, check out Bryan Cranston’s original version as Walter White here:

*picks jaw off floor*
There’s a reason why Cranston has the Emmy and it’s for scenes like this. I hate to say it, but it felt like Sam fell a little flat. I know what he was trying, but I wanted him to channel his inner-Jules. Here’s 5 TV (and one bonus) monologues/scenes that Samuel can do to totally make up for the Breaking Bad bomb.

 Mad Men – Don Draper

Here’s how it goes down when I encounter someone who’s never seen Mad Men:

Me: “You watch Mad Men?”
Them: “Nope. Never seen it.”
Me: “Here. Watch this.”
*plays clip*
Them: “WHATHE-“
Me: “Here’s season one. Call me when you’re done.”

Sons of Anarchy – Jax

This is a great show and it’s really picked up steam after season two (not going to lie, it could’ve been an FX thing, a production thing, or a creative thing but the first couple seasons felt like it was a little cheesy). Love this clip (though a little long) and would love to hear S.L.J.’s take on it.

 Game of Thrones – Littlefinger’s “Chaos” (NSFW – Graphic Content)

Before everyone had their mind blown away by the “Red Wedding”, Littlefinger’s Chaos Theory was the best scene to have happened to Game of Thrones this season (possibly of all the seasons combined). Granted, not really a “true monologue”, Sam Jackson could easily make this just as creepy and disturbing as Aiden Gillen.

 Deadwood – Al Swearengen (NSFW – Language)

Even though it only lasted three seasons, Deadwood is probably one of the most quotable shows (next to cartoons) amongst my friends and Al Swearengen is a total badass! Here’s a good line that makes him seem philosophical (…and a badass!).

Frasier – Bebe

Probably one of the more underappreciated comedies of the 90’s (mostly because Seinfeld was so dominant), Frasier is one of the most popular spinoffs and had some great lines. Here’s his agent going off about how hard she works. Granted, it’s over-acted but if you gave this to Jackson, it would be nothing short of amazing.

 

(…and speaking of “over-acting”)

 

BONUS: Any Given Sunday – “Every Inch Speech”

Yes, next to the hockey video, the thought of Samuel L. Jackson as a football coach pumping up the troops with a speech prepared by Oliver Stone is nothing short of amazing. I’d be willing to smash my face off a steel locker to get riled up for “the big game” if Jackson came at me with that kind of passion!  GO GET ‘EM!!! ARRRRRRR!!!!

 Thanks for reading and don’t forget to follow me on Twitter: @ChrisFudali

Giving You the Happiest “End”

Posted: June 3, 2013 in Movies

End vs End

This summer alone, it feels like we’re being hit hard with similar movies; I don’t mean superhero movies (because companies will always push for either a Superman, Iron Man, Batman, or whatever to drive for a big return): “Oblivion” is trying to compete with “Star Trek Into Darkness”, “Olympus Has Fallen” is going up against “White House Down”, even The Rock is competing with himself! The thing with all of these movies is that they’re all action; it’s probably easier to compete with action than anything else. But enter the two “Ends”.

This Is The End:

 The World’s End:

 Okay, now that you’ve (presumably) taken the time to watch both trailers, let’s break this down to see where your $12 should go.

Who’s In It?

This is – Stars everybody/anybody who’s ever made a Seth Rogen/Judd Apatow movie in the past decade plus Rihanna.
World’s – Stars Simon Pegg, Nick Frost, and a whack of other British actors whom you’ve probably never heard of.

Advantage: “This is” – The only reason why this gets the advantage is because of the number of people they can get to do this movie. That doesn’t make it better.

Plot (from what I can gather)

This Is – James Franco is holding a party and it turns into the Apocalypse. Chaos (and HILARITY) ensues.
World’s – One guy grasping at his youth wants to reunite his buddies for one last pub crawl. Turns out, the bar is located in a town overrun by aliens. Chaos (and hilarity) ensues.

Advantage: “World’s” – Face it, this one feels like it was actually thought out and written down. The Seth Rogen model of “get a bunch of buddies together and spew whatever we think is funny and then edit what doesn’t work” model is wearing thin.

Love Interest

This Is – Everyone’s ego.
World’s – Sam (Rosamund Pike….guessing?).

Advantage: This Is – This has nothing to do with the fact that Rosamund looks like she could play Taylor Swift in a movie but more of the fact that the potential narcissism of the “characters” in This Is The End will play out in the movie and could be funny. (…COULD be.)

Action?

This is – If you consider celebs falling into a pit action, then yes.
World’s – Half the trailer looks like one big bar brawl.

Advantage: World’s – As great as it is (in theory) to watch Seth Rogen & Co. argue how they’re going to split a Milky Way bar, you know from the past works of Shaun of the Dead and Hot Fuzz that the action sequences are going to be funny too.

Party?

This is – Yeah. It’s why they’re all together.
World’s – Looks like it…and it appears to involve schoolgirls.

Advantage: World’s – Oh, come on. As if this was even a contest! Think about it: you go to a party with RiRi, what are the odds of you getting within 15-feet before getting tossed aside by her bodyguards? World’s End has a schoolgirl licking face (and, no, that’s not a euphemism).

Booze/Drugs in the movie?

This is – It’s a Seth Rogen movie. Need you ask?
World’s – Booze, most definitely (it’s a freaking pub crawl!). Drugs? Unsure.

Advantage: World’s – This may come as a shocker but just because your movie might have a coked-up Michael Cera doesn’t mean it’s worth the price of admission. However, watching a drunken Simon Pegg fight (what appears to be) intergalactic beings would be.

Final Say – It really looks like if you have only $12 to spend this summer, it looks like “The World’s End” would be a far funnier movie to see and-

*notices email popped up*

*reads email*

*death-stares at email*

Well, like I was saying. The company I work for (that shall not be named out of fear for legal consequences) is doing an advanced screening of “This Is The End”, so if you’re only going to catch one “End” movie this summer, definitely invest your $12 this summer to see that movie!

Thanks for reading and don’t forget to follow me on Twitter: @ChrisFudali